Abbreviations Are Killing Me.

Let me drop a little counterintuitive smack on the folks using abbreviations. This might sting a little.

Those abbreviations actually don’t save time.

Also, is that why you’re doing it? Maybe they save time for you, because you don’t want to type out of the rest of the word. Or you don’t want to take the effort to form the sounds that will round out the remaining syllables of a word.

That might save you time. Like, fractions of fractions of seconds. It can’t even be measured.

But what can be measured is the time it takes the person on the receiving end to compute what the hell you’re actually saying. Dropping a ridiculous abbreviation into the middle of an otherwise normal sentence is like suddenly beginning to speak in another dialect.

It’s jarring. And requires an eye roll, usually.

I know. I’m old. And this is most often a young thing – but do we all need to always be okay with what the “younger generation” is doing? Do we always have to defer to them? Even when it’s crazy? Maybe I’m all wound up because I’m a word nerd.

Do we need to have a sesh to discuss it? Do we need to be part of the distro on this?

Seriously. Why are these dangling, orphaned fragments part of language? James Earl Jones agrees with me — I think?

totes

Don’t get me wrong, I’m totally down with meaningful abbreviations and acronyms, although some acronyms make me feel like the main character in the Da Vinci Code. It’s not good. And it makes me sweaty.

I find it hard to believe that the effort required to close out the second syllable of the word “session” is insurmountable. I also struggle with knowing how abandoning the “bution” at the end of “distro” is good for anyone. Ever.

And if you think I’m just grouchy and disconnected, you’re wrong. A little.

Confession: I totally made up a weird-o language with my best friend when we were younger, and although the words meant nothing, they totally meant everything when we needed to use them. And no one knew what the hell we were talking about. Sometimes we didn’t, even, and that led to endless laughter and weird looks.

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About the time we were fluent in our weird-o language. Also the time we chose to take photos with ketchup bottles.

What is a “fry a rye” after all?  We know. So it’s fine. But I’d never consider dropping a “fry a rye” in the middle of some real conversation. With adults.

I also rely on the ol’ “totes” and “obvs” with friends, but only because it’s entirely making fun of the “words.” I wouldn’t use them for real.

So, no. Don’t put me on that distro. I’ll be having a sesh with folks who have the energy to finish words.

Adi.

*(I obvs had to finish with an abbrev of a word from a diff language. Duh.)